How Amazing Are You!
“What can you contribute to our
corporation,” the straight-to-the-fact interviewer in an unscathed business
uniform asked? “Well I am a hard-worker, I am very creative and I am easy to
work with,” I replied, in an uncertain voice, hoping that I sounded somewhat
confident. “But what are you good at, what did you accomplish in life?”, pushed
the interviewer in an overly-confident voice that clearly outshone and
diminished my shaky and nervous appeal. “Well I was a cross-country captain in
high school, I won the national merit scholarship, I graduated from Stanford
university with honors in Physics, I won a national chess tournament, I have
consistently won the presidential award for volunteering every year since 8th
grade and I started a charity the homeless that has grown nationwide.” I
breathed sigh of relief and thought, “What a long list!” The interviewer jotted
down some notes on her clean and orderly notepad, with a very expensive
looking, and shiny, ballpoint pen. “Ok that will be all, you may leave,” was
all she said in a very bored voice.
In a world where we rush to get from
one job to another, or one extracurricular to the next, we often label
ourselves as great based on our accomplishments, wealth or popularity. This
façade called the “American Dream” often pushed us the brink of exhaustion,
just so we can feel validated by our jobs or hobbies. We let our jobs or wealth
define us, and sometimes we use it to justify that we are better, smarter or
more amazing than others. This can sometimes lead us into a nationwide rat
race, where we just keep thinking that what we are is not enough. Though many
look to the American Dream as an idealized goal, I would say that it is a
misguided notion that is leading us into despair. Here, I will explain why.
The “American” dream, not the
European dream or the worldwide dream, just “American” dream. The dream does
not even refer to Canada, Mexico, Latin America or South America, which are all
indeed part of the Americas. It just refers to those who live in the United
States, which is amazingly exclusive. Though some may argue that the American
Dream was meant to encourage and inspire the citizens of a growing nation that
was founded in July 4th, 1776, it really did not turn out that way.
It was first used to encourage the so-called “Americans” to expand their
territory, which was, for the most part, taken forcefully from the Native
Americans that lived there. The reason we took the land, we say, was because we
believed that we were better than those savage Native Americans who did not
practice Christianity, the greatest and most powerful religion.
Now you might be asking how this applies
to the current day United States. “We apologized to those Indians (the term we
called them and still do today, even though they are not in fact Indians) and
the abusive treatment of the Indians leaves a dark mark in United States
history,” you might say. Well I say, “Have we ever returned their lands? Have
we ever apologized for manipulating them into signing land treaties, instead of
just apologizing for their bad treatment?” I believe in the saying that “old
habits die hard”. We thought we were better than the Native Americans
throughout the 18th to 19th century, and yet now we
believe that we are better than the world in the 21st century.
This cultural basis of superiority
destroys us from within as well, since not only do we think that we are better
than people from outside the U.S., but we think that we are better than other
U.S. citizens as well. According to Mark Manson, author of the essay, “The
American Dream is Killing us” the misguided American Dream leads us to
exploiting others, justifying people’s value on what they achieve and enforces
the belief that people get what they deserve. It is no wonder how these actions
lead to mass competitiveness for popularity, smartness or wealth.
A testament to this vicious cut-throat
nature, is seen in the introduction. No matter how much you do, there is a part
of you that feels that you are not enough. American society encourages this,
making you feel inferior and inspiring you to continue working yourself to death
to validate yourself. I personally have seen this in my High School. It seems
scary that this attitude has spread to the younger nature, but it has. Walking
through the bustling, way too bright hallways I recall why I left high school to
do PSEO. My group of friends was termed as the nerd group and they kept with
their title as if it proved that they belonged there. I always felt off with
them. I never realized it until I left. All they cared about was studying and
working. They rarely had fun or free time, keeping busy with orchestra, band,
soccer, tennis, volunteering or the multitude of other extracurricular that
they felt required to do. They never could just sit and read a book, or watch
TV. They could never relax because they could not let themselves. They had to
work so much, and I agree that some did it for passion, but it was not very
long before that passion turned into something more manufactured. I know this,
because I was like them up to a point. I drove myself crazy thinking that I
needed to be doing something with every second of my time. Up until a year ago,
when I escaped that rat race, I never realized that there were other, more
important things in life.
Though the idea of American Superiority dominated
the mind in the 18th and 19th centuries, the competition
for material wealth became heavily emphasized in the 20th century.
According to Kimberly Amadeo, writer of the essay “What is the American Dream
Today”, “Over time, the definition of
happiness started to change. In the 1920s,
it became the acquisition of material things, as exemplified by the novel The Great Gatsby. A pursuit of happiness driven by greed was not attainable because someone else
always had more. This greed led to the stock
market crash of 1929 and
the Great
Depression.” The pursuit of happiness
is still something that exists very much today. But, if happiness is not the
acquisition of wealth or material belongings, like the American Dream states,
what is it?
According to the World Happiness Index, the
U.S. is ranked at 13 out of 53 countries. For a country that promotes the
pursuit of happiness as a part of the American Dream, shouldn’t we be ranked
higher on the list? This implies that working is not everything and it is
certainly not the basis for happiness. To look into what happiness is, we are
going to look at an interesting survey that recorded the top regrets of people
before they died. In a list of 5 regrets, the second biggest regret is “I wish
I hadn’t worked so hard.” Nowhere on the list did people regret not having
enough fame or wealth. Other regrets included, “I wish I had stayed in touch
with my friends, I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings and I wish
that I had less myself be happier.” When I tried to figure out what happiness
is, I happened upon an interesting conclusion. Happiness is a choice, it is not
a race, it is not an unattainable object, it is a choice.
I did not intend to completely bash the United
States, I just wanted to point out some key flaws in something that I think can
greatly be improved. There are better definitions of an American dream. Amadeo
states in her article a new dream, “For example, the Center for a New American Dream envisions "... a
focus on more of what really matters, such as creating a meaningful life,
contributing to community and society, valuing nature, and spending time with
family and friends."” Happiness comes from within. Ultimately it comes
down to one choice, work on industrialized passions or find a real passion and
spend time with those you love? The choice is ultimately up to you, but always
remember that one of the biggest regrets in life was “I wished I hadn’t worked
so hard” not “I wished I had worked more”.
Works Cited
Amdeo,
Kimberly. “What Is the American Dream Today?” The Balance. N.p., n.d. Web. 19 Feb.
2017. < https://www.thebalance.com/what-is-the-american-dream-today-3306027>.
Hrala, Josh. "The World Happiness Index 2016
Just Ranked the Happiest Countries on
Earth." ScienceAlert.
N.p., n.d. Web. 19 Feb. 2017. < http://www.sciencealert.com/the-world-happiness-index-2016-just-ranked-the-happiest-countries-on-earth>.
Manson, Mark. "The American Dream Is Killing
Us." Mark Manson. N.p., 30 Jan. 2017. Web.
19
Feb. 2017. < https://markmanson.net/american-dream>.
Moore, Susie. "The 5 Biggest Regrets People
Have Before They Die." Greatist. Greatist, 07 Feb.
2017.
Web. 19 Feb. 2017. < http://greatist.com/live/most-common-regrets>.
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